I wouldn't expect you to be since I kind of disappeared for more than half a year and never finished telling the stories of my time abroad. For that I am very regretful, because the best few months of my life happened during the time that I didn't update this blog. Let me catch you up briefly...
So my wonderful boyfriend Huy proposed to marry me on May 7th, through Skype!!! I know, I know, it's crazy; and of course I accepted his offer! haha. So after that I spent my time making the wedding plans because we wanted to get married in Vietnam and then have a reception in the US after we graduate in May 2014. My last few weeks in China were a blast. I studied hard, got good grades, and had the best time with my friends. My American friend who was moving to Beijing to work even surprised me at my door, which was just magical! I also had my friend from Hangzhou come to Beijing, and I was her tour guide of Beijing!
Of course, after finding out that not only was I going to be meeting Huy's family, but I was also going to BECOME part of his family, I tried to learn as much Vietnamese as possible! I didn't learn much though because I had to also focus on Chinese studies, but I had enough to get by during the first few days.
So, leaving Beijing wasn't as hard as I thought because I was super excited for the next chapter of my adventure, and of my life. I ended up getting stuck in Kuala Lumpur because the first flight missed the connection, so I was there for 8 hours, nervous of course! It was pretty cool though, because I met a Vietnamese girl who was studying in Beijing and heading home for the break. We talked a lot and she kind of taught me some Vietnamese. We sat together on the flight from Malaysia to Vietnam but after we separated in the airport I didn't see her again. I do have her contact in my phone though.
Meeting Huy's parents at the airport was so amazing. It was seriously like a dream. I came out from the airport and I saw Huy and walked over and we hugged (even though PDA is frowned upon in Vietnam). Then mom and dad were there waiting for me. Mom had a basket with flowers and they both gave me a hug. I greeted them in Vietnamese and they seemed pleased. The house was a 5 minute drive from the airport which was very convenient. We got to the house and the Karaoke manager helped to carry my stuff inside. When I got in I took a hot shower and then ate dinner. I was very tired from the traveling so I went to bed early, but I was happy to be back with my love again, and to be in his home country with his amazing family.
So the family at home consists of grandma, dad, mom, brother-in-law Hai, sister Lien, Lien's baby Nhím, Huy, and me. Honestly, I'm trying to write about my time in Vietnam but I'm almost at a loss for words because it was so amazing, I just don't know how to describe my time there in a way that can even halfway convey my feelings for this amazing country and family. I don't know where to start, but there is so much to write, it might actually take me all night to compose this entry. My heart is melting and I feel like crying as I remember all the times I had in Vietnam.
I just sit here and I think about different moments, and I get lost in my memories. I'm infatuated with my life in Vietnam and I want to be there now. I feel like life has more meaning because I felt I was special to everyone there. There wasn't a day that went by that felt like it was wasted, which is how I feel a lot of the time in the United States. Sorry, I keep getting off track, I will try to actually TELL you what I did in Vietnam.
So the next day after arriving, I had to try on some dresses because we were getting out wedding photo shoot done, which is common in Vietnam. You get professional photos done before the wedding and then you have a wedding album to show off. :) So I was trying on dresses and getting to know the people who would be taking our photos. The first few days were a little hard because my mind was still in Chinese language mode and I didn't know much Vietnamese, so a lot of the time I just sat in my own little world, unsure what the conversation around me entailed.
During the first few days, I was also trying to make friends with my soon to be niece, Nhím. Those days, she would just stare at me whenever I was around, but wouldn't want to come near me. I'm also not usually good with babies and young children, that's more my sister's field of expertise. This little girl though, she was the cutest ever. I wanted her to love me. I just wanted to pick her up and hold her tight. But I had to wait, and within a few days we started to play together. In a few short weeks we became great friends, playing all the time. She would come and grab my hand to dance, make me put on random high heeled shoes, and I also had to sing songs for her and she would clap at the end. She didn't talk when I first got there, but started to while I was there. I was so happy when she called her mother "mum" and when she learned to say "bye" and wave. Now, her parents can speak English but they only really speak English to me at home. As you know my Vietnamese was not good, but when it was just Nhím and I, I would practice what I could and she would understand me. I could go on and on about my dear baby Nhím, but I will get back to the story.
.jpg)
The photo shoot was so intense! We had to wake up at 3am and get a taxi to the studio. I was so tired but at 3:30am I was getting false eyelashes and makeup applied. Just before the sun came up, we went to this church to get the first photos. From there we went to many locations, first in the city and then in more rural places, and finally at the beach. I was so cool, I felt like a princess with all the beautiful clothes. We didn't get home from the photo shoot until dinner time. Below is a link to the youtube video which I uploaded the wedding photos. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_koI4SETqNg
That was just amazing! So the photo shoot was on July 10th, and the wedding was on July 19th. We had to go to the embassy and other government places to take care of a lot of paperwork.. Marriage between foreigners is not an easy task! There was documents, and interviews, the works! In order to go to the different places, Huy drove us on the motorbike which was another highlight! That was so much fun!!! I loved to zip around, or sometimes get caught in traffic, but it was still so cool.
We had two big dates for our wedding, July 19th was the traditional wedding at home and July 31st was the reception at a restaurant. None of my family came to the wedding but it was fine. Let's talk about the traditional wedding. So it was held at Huy's house and I got to wear the traditional áo dài.
First, I got ready and then Huy and I went over how the ceremony was going to happen. I was going to have to pour alcohol into a small cup and offer it to all of the family members, starting from oldest to youngest. They would give us good wishes and a gift, usually of money or jewelry. At the beginning of the ceremony, we had to light the incense for the ancestors and Huy said something I didn't understand. We had to bow and then begin the ceremony. We started with mom and dad and then offered the drink to everyone. After, we put the rings on each other and we were married!!! No kissing the bride though.. I know, strange!! hah.
 |
| Me and sis |
 |
| Mom and Dad |
 |
| Grandma |
 |
| Uncle and Aunt |
 |
| The rings |
 |
| Family |
 |
| Mom and Dad <3 |
Officially part of the family!!!!! :)
So that was the traditional ceremony, and on the 31st we had the reception. Wedding reception in Vietnam is very different from the United States. There is no music and dancing and cake. Instead, 250 people, almost all of whom I did not know, came to the restaurant, took a photo with us, and then had a nice dinner. Then we went on the stage, they announced us, we cut a fake cake, poured fake champagne, and confetti flew. We went to each table of people, took photos, and then it was time for them to go so we went back to the door to say goodbye to everyone and thank you. I was exhausted by the end of it, and was so glad to be going on our honeymoon!
So there! All of the wedding things had finished, butttt of course we went on a honey moon!!! We went to Mũi Né and stayed at a beach resort for 2 days and 3 nights. It was so good to finally relax after all of the preparing for the wedding.
.jpg)
So, the day I left, you can only imagine how upset I was. Mom took Huy and I to the airport, and when I said goodbye to baby Nhím, I started to cry in the taxi. It just killed me to know that I had to leave her and go back to America, and miss her growing up. I got hold of myself and we went to the airport and got ready to go to our gate. For the last 20 minutes we sat on the bench with mom, my head on her shoulder. Mom and I have an interesting relationship. We cannot communicate well because of the language barrier, but we both love each other very much. With my last minutes being in Vietnam, I wanted to be as close to mom as I could. She is so amazing. She cares so much for everyone in the family, and she makes sure everyone is safe, healthy and happy. She is the ideal mother in my eyes, and I can't believe I am lucky to call her mine now. Of all the luck that has been involved with me meeting Huy and falling in love with him, I feel so happy to have gotten his parents. Dad and I were not too close, but he is still a great man who also cares for his children so much. They are both very beautiful people. Mom, well, there just isn't enough that I can say to describe the feelings, so I will tell you what happened when we said goodbye. I said to her, "con chào mẹ" (bye mom) and I couldn't say anything more, because I started to cry heavily. I clung to her tightly and shook and wept, I didn't want to leave her. She treated me with so much love and kindness and I didn't want to say goodbye for this extended period of time. She also did not say much, "mẹ chào con" (bye child), and Huy was trying to get me to walk away. I held onto mom once more and then made my back back into the airport doors as we made the way to our gate. I don't think anyone expected me to cry as much as I did when saying goodbye to mom, I know I didn't expect it myself. Even as I write this I feel like I'm going to cry again, stirring up this memory and those feelings with are still deep within my heart, and shall stay forever.
Lung linh,lung linh tình mẹ tình cha
Lung linh,lung linh cùng một mái nhà
Lung linh,lung linh cùng buồn cùng vui
Lung linh,lung linh hai tiếng gia đình.
---Gai đình---
